1. If your colleague sneezes on you, you should:

a. Have them and their family put down.
b. Tweet about it.
c. Go splash B100,000 on vaccines and pills at a hospital near you.
d. Hire her/him as a waiter in Restaurant City.

2. The latest rumor on the baby panda is:

a. It’s actually Thaksin in a tiny panda suit.
b. It’s actually God in a tiny panda suit.
c. It’s actually a baby panda in a tiny panda suit.
d. It’s actually a conspiracy by the government to distract
people from stories about the government.

3. Claims on who really owns Preah Vihear were revived. If
we got our hands on it, we would:

a. Make it into a casino.
b. Never go there. It’s too far, it’s hot, it’s in the jungle, it’s old.
c. Sell it to the highest bidder.
d. Let the TAT give it a new spelling and open a direct THAI
Airways route from Oslo.

4. The government plans to lure tourists back to Thailand with:

a. Hot, all-female riot squads.
b. The catchy slogan “So much safer than Iran.”
c. Free tickets on the government’s secret tsunami space ship. Shh!
d. Banning alcohol except during happy hour on the last Friday of
every month.

5. Bhumjaithai got its ass kicked by Puea Thai in Sakhon
Nakhon because:

a. Democracy only works in areas with a Starbucks ratio of one for every 50 people.
b. Puea Thai cheated by campaigning and distributing leaflets.
c. Bumjaithai would only promise to buy half the rotten rice and longan in the province.
d. Surprise! Thaksin, he ain’t over yet.